He comments on what you’re eating, then backs it up by saying he can’t eat that because he has a medical condition that prevents issue-free digestion of said food.  Then pounds SILK Soy Creamer into his tea.  Dude, it’s chicken, broccoli, and almonds.

He eats 4-8 pieces of fruit per day, spending about 30min washing it in the workplace kitchen sink.   

He wears black undershirts, under his work shirts.

He wears pleated pants.  For the love of Claude…

He walks by people in conversation and throws in a “Hey guys” as though they had acknowledged his approach and passing. 

He doesn’t wear a wedding ring, so he’s either divorced or one of those married assholes who doesn’t wear a wedding ring. 

He is monotonous, which comes across less “cool” and more “condescending.”

I may be reading something into this, but I wouldn’t drive to a gig with this guy, so he gets the Nicehole* award.

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*nicehole – n. – Any person who doesn’t overtly act in a manner that warrants being thrown to the ground, yet drives you up the wall.  Ex; Starting conversations they want to dominate. Comparing their troubles as a pet owner to yours as a parent.  Unable to take a visual or verbal cue that you’d like to end the interaction.  Pestering in a “Oh come on, you’ll have fun” kind of way. 

If you have seen the movie “Extract,” David Koechner’s character “Nathan,” the guy across the street is a perfect example.