Pretty Much Paleo Pancakes

1/4tsp Baking Soda

1/4tsp Sea salt (It’s all the rage)

2Tbsp whey protein powder (the more grass-fed/organic/isolated the better), vanilla is best

2 eggs (from the closest thing to “homeless” chickens as possible)

1 pretty ripe banana 

1Tbsp Almond or (GASP) Peanut butter

2Tbsp coconut flour 

  1. First, get your family far away from you so you can get some head-space and just make some awesome pancakes for them.  Usually they just slow down everything you’re doing.
  2. Throw the ‘nana, nut butter, eggs into a bowl and beat ’em til smooth.  That’s what I did.  You can do it differently but don’t bitch if it sucks.
  3. Sift in the protein powder, give it a couple turns.  
  4. Sift in the salt, baking soda, and coconut flour.  Turn ’em til smooth.  Maybe beat it again to smooth it up.
  5. Smoooooooth.  Ya feel me?
  6. Let it sit a bit, get all together.
  7. Heat a pan up to just-past the mid-point on the burner.  
  8. Ideally you’re dropping some coconut oil in that hot pan til it melts.  Swirl it all around, coat that pan like the back of a Summer fling on a Tahitian beach resort chaaaaaise.  Smooth.
  9. Then drop some of that batter in there and PAY ATTENTION!  The high-fat content will get the cakes browning up pretty quickly so don’t get yourself in a burned cake mode.  Try a test cake, drop like a quarter-sized dollop in there, see how it goes.  
  10. Taste test!  How’s it?  Good!
  11. Now you can do what comes naturally when making cakes.  Do it up.  Make a few big ones.  Make a couple little ones.  
  12. Enjoy.  Feel the power.  

Nutritional Information:

Calories:  enough
Fat:  good for you and enough
Carbs:  just a bit, maybe like 50g total if you eat the whole batch yourself
     Fiber:  8g or so
Protein:  like 30g or so.

I’m sure a strict Paleotian is preparing a response to this and getting their crossfit shorts in a wad, but please remember:
I’M NOT TRYING TO CHANGE THE WORLD OF PALEO EATING THROUGH ONE RECIPE THAT WORKED OUT WELL FOR ME AND MADE MY KIDS FORGET ABOUT REGULAR PANCAKES.  Also, eat sh*t.

Don’t feed the trolls, feed your beast.

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About Geoff Lott

Geoff Lott is a "thinking person's comedian" as much as a "drinking person's comedian." Born and raised near Seattle, his writing and comedy is Cloudy with a Chance of Hope. Less offensive than your average nightly news program, Geoff is opinionated with intent, and a rebel without a clause. A comedian, actor, dad, husband, co-worker, weirdo, and great friend, Geoff Lott has a sense of humor like a sommelier's sense of smell; aged well, with a hint of dark chocolate, Irish whiskey, and leather. Credits and press kit available upon request!
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